Friday, May 30, 2014

I'd Kill to Grill Right Now

Those of you who live in a place in which you are allowed to having cooking appliances like grills and such...please allow me to say that I hope dearly that you love and cherish those  things right now.  Do it for me, please.

If I had access to a grill right now, this is what I'd do:

This is a wood-grilled ground sirloin steak (think glorified hamburger, really).  It's lying (laying?  who cares right now?) atop a crouton that has been smeared in ... wait for it, horseradish sauce.

*Collective Sigh*

Now.  Here's where the fun begins.  The dish would have been delicious as is; I ordered my meat medium rare, and that is exactly what I got.  The horseradish sauce was strong and tangy and the crouton provided a nice, carby base.

But Mary's Bistro here in Mackinac Island goes above and beyond.  With grilled bananas.

I know what you're thinking: What. The. Hell.

I was skeptical as well.  Then I tasted it.  And it blew my mind.  The heat of the grill, for some strange but scientifically explainable reason, makes the fruit sweeter, while lending a smoky flavor to it as well.  This sweet-smoky addition really hems in nicely the savory meat and tangy, sharp horseradish.  It's like a freaking food trifecta on one plate, man.  I mean, I didn't have to order dessert, you know what I'm saying?

However, this dish was one of only a few standouts on the menu that were different and unusual.  Otherwise, the menu consists of ribs, chicken tenders, chicken pot pie, etc.  But, you know, lots of people dig that kind of Americana...just not me right now.  No offense.

Here was the perturbing thing about the whole meal.

My waitress brought me oil and bread before the main event, and I was rather excited.  I'd never been served bread in a cute little white paper bag before...but then I opened the bag.   Then, I took a picture.

Look, I know America has a carbohydrate addiction problem.  We eat too much refined, processed flours and sugars.  We know!  But dammit, that bread looks really lonely and pathetic in there by itself.  And what a waste of a roomy paper bag. 

Eating at Mary's Bistro and living here on the island has impelled me to start my Christmas shopping list:

1.  A really nice grill (obviously gas would be way easier, but I wouldn't mind a wood-burning one, either)

2. A state-of-the-art gas stove.  I'm pretty sure I'd get a +4 modifier on my sauté skills (which, by the way, are getting pretty good anyway).

3. Other stuff which will be named at a later date.

Happy weekends, everybody!

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